The Trip to Banburyby David BlagroveOh, didn't we have an 'orrible timeThe trip we went to Banbury.First when we loaded we buried the dog,Fifteen tonnes of cobbles on top of him.When we dug down to get the thing outHe bit our Dad on the backside,Ripping a lump of his best corduroysAnd the air went blue.Chorus :Diddle de dee; diddle de dee, diddly diddly dee.Ma went in the shop beside Suttons StopTo buy a trip's worth of groceriesThought she would do us an Indian meal-Boil in the bag and add some water-All the next day the family queued,Taking turns for the Karsi.Mother got stuck in the engine hole doorsAnd the air went blue.ChorusWhen we got round the Hillmorton PoundThe butty went up on the inside,Motor went into the outside lock,Our Kid found she just wouldn't hold back.He hit the sill a terrible thump,Dad was still sat on the Karsi.He finished up with his head in the bilgeAnd the air went blue.ChorusFather eased off the motor boat's revs,Passing linear mooringsThough they went on for nearly a mileAnd most of the boats were floating rubbish heaps.All of a sudden the governor jammedThe motor boat went like thunder,Busting a whole ruck of hippy boats looseAnd the air went blue.ChorusGetting near Napton, we chucked off the bike,Our Kid straight way got a puncture.Mended it quick, then blew the thing up,Quite forgot to slacken the brakes off.First time he stopped he went over the bars,The towpath covered in dog crap.In he went, going arse over tit,And the air went blue.ChorusWe pulled the head off a new cabin shaft,Trying to rake out a bladeful,So Father got in in his underpants,When they got wet they became quite see-through.When he got out to dry himself offHe frightened a field full of donkeys.They stampeded and knocked us all downAnd the air went blue.ChorusMother got hit on the head with a weight,Trying to pull up a drawbridge.Father was steering the butty and soStood in the hatches and laughed his socks off.Mother got peeved and loosed off her grip,Down came the drawbridge on Father.Mother got flung in the top of a treeAnd the air went blue.ChorusWhen we got down to Banbury townWe couldn't find where to emptySo father went round to a telephone boxRang up the firm, reversing the charges.We should have gone to Bunbury instead,That's a place on the Shropshire Union."Bugger!" said Father, "We've come the wrong road!"And the air went blue.Chorus David Blagrove stated that this was 'written in 1990 and not entirely based on imagination. Verse 6 owes a little to the Kipper Family of Trunch, Norfolk.'Tune: 'The day we went to Bangor'